Can You Hear Me Now

I left the ending ambiguous, because that is the way life is.

Bernardo Bertolucci

One of my last good friends at Avaya was laid off last week. Although he and I only worked on the same project team for the last four years of my employed life, we share a history of jobs, customers, conventions, and business partners that goes back decades. I expect that if you mingled my connections with his connections, we would create a web that ties us to nearly everyone in the communications industry.

As large as the ecosystem is, it can also feel quite small and at times somewhat incestuous. For years my mantra was, “Be careful about what you say and do. The person you piss off today just might be your boss, customer, or coworker tomorrow.”

I began my post-university working life at a company called Northern Telecom way back in 1983. 26 years and several name changes later, a bankrupt Nortel was purchased by Avaya. It’s both ironic and somewhat inevitable that I closed out my career where it began. If I hadn’t been pushed out of Nortel when the acquisition was solidified, I might have spent my entire career in the same place. Us Cancers are not fond of change. Instead, I was forced to find a home at an Avaya business partner. When I was let go from Converge One ten years later during the COVID purge, I reached out to my contacts and quickly found myself back home again.

Fun fact. My ConvergeOne layoff was one for the books. The company was struggling and employees were asked to voluntarily defer some of their income in order to help get through the rough patch. The plan was that we would be reimbursed with interest the following year. It felt like the right thing to do at the time so I signed up. On the first payday of the program, I went online to see how much my check went down. However, instead of receiving less money, I saw a much bigger number than the previous pay cycle. I quickly realized that the extra money came from a lump sum payout off all my outstanding vacation time. I immediately IMed my manager asking, “Was I laid off and nobody bothered to tell me?” The answer was “Yes” and within minutes I was busy networking for a new job.

Hello, Hello, Goodbye

I experienced my first layoff less than 30 days after the start of my Northern Telecom job. Thankfully, I wasn’t let go, but the man who trained me in was. Needless to say, I was shocked. It was my trial-by-fire lesson that it didn’t matter who you were, what you knew, or what you did. Good, and sometimes amazing people were let go for reasons that had more to do with the bottom line than anything found in a performance review. I experienced that time and time again.

For the next four decades I lived through two to four reductions in force every year — the Christmas Layoff became a way to mark the passing of time. I was only sent packing twice, but that didn’t make the times I was spared a walk in the park. The leadup to a layoff is stressful, saying goodbye to friends and colleagues is difficult, picking up extra work is painful, not knowing who to turn to after positions are discontinued is frustrating, and being a survivor fills those left behind with guilt. “Why not me?” Since this was an endless cycle throughout my entire working life, I was always waiting for the next shoe to drop.

She loves me
she loves me not
she packs her grip and drives away

Hello
hello
goodbye

I Got the Pink Slip, Daddy

In the case of my recent Avaya friend, he will be okay. In fact, for the past two years, I had been regularly joking about why he was still sticking around. He is old enough for Medicare and Social Security and his wife retired from her career a few years ago. Being let go will not lead to upgrading his resume.

Still, my friend would have felt better if he left on his own terms. That’s what I did and even though I knew I was going to pass up severance money when my number inevitably came up, I wanted to be the one who willingly chose to say “goodbye.” Getting a pink slip would not have broken me, but it would have cast a shadow over my road to retirement.

Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you’re alive, it isn’t. Richard Bach

Since stepping away from Avaya, I have kept a close watch on my old companies and the companies I partnered with. I have friends and acquaintances all around the world and it is painful to see LinkedIn “Open to Work” banners show up on so many profile photos. I rejoice when my connections find something new and commiserate when their search drags on for months and months — an all too often occurrence these days. While I may not be drawing a paycheck any longer, I have not forgotten how important they are and how the lack thereof can make a person feel very helpless. I know what it is like to suddenly face an uncertain and sometimes frightening future.

Nothin Don’t Mean Nothin, Honey, if it Ain’t Free

My friend’s unexpected and unwelcomed layoff closes out an important and meaningful chapter of my life. As Kris Kristofferson wrote and Janis Joplin famously sang, “Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose.” No longer do I have someone I can talk day-to-day Avaya with. I will especially miss our regular state-of-Infinity (Avaya’s latest cloud contact center platform) check-ins. Despite the serious headwinds, corporate mistakes, and constant company downsizing, I still care about Avaya and hope for the best of all possible outcomes — as limited as those scenarios often feel these days. Avaya (and by extension, Northern Telecom and Nortel) will always be my work family. This is the end I didn’t look forward to, but always knew was just around the corner.

Thank you for reading.

We were good to each other, weren’t we
careless and carefree, spontaneous
we were lovers that knew no boundaries
we were friends through good times and bad

But now the light has lessened
as darkness chips away at both ends of day
no longer does the sun wrap herself around me
and my eyes strain to find you
through the black shroud of night

I have always struggled with goodbyes
so let this be fare thee well
the ice will melt
the shadows will succumb to the light
and we will love again
one sunny summer day