Can You Hear Me Now

The climb might be tough and challenging, but the view is worth it. There is a purpose for that pain; you just can’t always see it right away.

Victoria Arlen

I did my 27th Tofte Trek this morning. The Tofte Trek is a grueling 10k wilderness run that takes you up a mountain, across a segment of the Lake Superior Hiking Trail, down the mountain, and finally through a boggy wetland. Over the years, I’ve tripped over rocks and roots, been stung by bees, taken a wrong turn, slogged through knee-deep water, and have been bitten by countless mosquitos and horse flies.

I’ve run it in the rain. I’ve run it on hot and muggy days. I’ve run it when the mud was so deep that my shoes were nearly sucked off my feet. Needless to say, it’s one of the highlights of my year.

This is not because I am a glutton for punishment. I don’t like pain. I do this because it is important to occasionally push myself really hard. While I am not adverse to flaking out and expressing my inner sloth, I can’t live my entire life within my comfort zone. I need to stretch my boundaries in order to keep moving forward.

Full discloser: After 24 years of running the Trek, two years ago I began doing it as a race-walk. As important as it is for me to challenge my body, I also need to recognize that I am in my sixties and no longer have the knees of a 20-something. That doesn’t make the Trek a walk in the park, though. It’s still the same abusive, muddy course and I continue to push myself hard within this new framework. I walk it like I stole it.

Move Along

Movement is a major part of my self care. It’s one of the ways I let go of my ego and work on becoming unstuck. Movement is where I ask myself difficult questions, contemplate next steps, prepare for change, revel in gratitude, and begin to move myself in new and different directions.

While I can usually accomplish the above with a modest walk or bike ride, I sometimes need to kick myself into high gear. There are life challenges that can only be met by doing something extraordinary. Well, extraordinary for me. It’s knowing that I am not afraid to take on something extremely difficult and see it through from beginning to end. This typically takes the form of a strenuous bike ride, but once every Fourth of July it happens here on the North Shore of Lake Superior.

Fun fact: 11 years ago I ran the Trek minutes after pulling a nail out of my foot. While heading to the starting line, I stepped on a nail-ridden board hidden in the tall grasses of the parking lot. I yanked the board and nail out, did a quick wash of my foot, tightened the laces of my shoes, gritted my teeth, and crossed the finish line 50-plus minutes later.

I got a tetanus shot the next day and could hardly walk on that foot for weeks. Even so, I would do it again.

Go To Any Length

Six years ago I was forced to make a huge and important change. The impetus of the change may become the subject of a future blog article, but for now all you need to know is that I finally found the strength to begin a major transformation. It was long overdue.

Like the physical stamina required to complete a wilderness run, the mental, emotional, and spiritual strength necessary to turn one’s life around is enormous. This is not something you decide to do one day and you’re done the next. It’s a long slog that takes you to places you never dreamed you would see. Better said, it takes you to places you never realized you needed to see.

Despite the pain and setbacks, I’ve learned to love pushing myself as hard as I can as I drive towards an emotional/spiritual finish line. I do this even though the line is constantly moving. I will never be everything I strive to be, but that doesn’t stop me from swinging for the fences. It’s a race I win simply by running it. I only lose if I quit.

Post Race Pondering

None of this is meant as bragging. Take a look at my Tofte Trek finish times over the years and it will become apparent that I am not an elite runner. I kept hoping that as I aged up I would find my age-group competition easier, but there are a lot of fast old guys out there. Even in the 60-plus running bracket the best I could do was a distant 4th. Thankfully, winning ribbons has never been my reason for taking on any endeavor.

Beyond the Trek, I’ve learned that I need to regularly exercise my emotional wellbeing as much as I need to exercise my body. Without physical movement the body grows weak. The same can be said for one’s spirit. If you aren’t growing spiritually, you are dying.

Here’s to the big challenges we all put ourselves through. The course might be daunting and the obstacles plentiful, but the satisfaction of making your way towards the finish line (no matter how far back in the pack you are or think you are) is worth it. The journey is the destination and it’s one sweet and sweaty ride.

Thank you for reading.

Stretching
pushing back the walls as far as they can take it
then pushing that much more

Think of a balloon filled to capacity
strained, but holding

It’s excess or nothing
go big or go home